I have been going through profound changes, and I sense that all the
pieces of the puzzle are finally coming together.
I have been experiencing I am putting together into this direction
map. I am calling it:
HeART of LOVING." Please join me
on this journey for falling in love with yourself.
These are the land marks, the directions, BUT LOVE IS NOT THE DESTINATION…IT IS
HAS SAID: “LOVE YOURSELF AND YOU HAVE FOUND YOUR PURPOSE AND YOUR
1. It is true that my distortions, and my belief in my
wounding has created a magnet that has attracted others who will
mirror back to me what I believe are my “faults / lacks.” Those
that I meet and have these “conflicts” with are my soul’s assignments
to help me understand that
-CASTIGATION IS NOT HOLY WORK.”
Give yourself time to look over your life and your relationships and
the “beautiful problems” that you have struggled with. Please
take the time to write down these challenges and also those with whom
you have experienced these conflicts. Our problems are created from the
insistent belief that we are our “WOUNDINGS”.
It is our defensive behavior created to avoid feeling the original pain
that is responsible for our suffering. We insist on
recreating these relationships because we believe that we “WILL” overcome them with our WILL AND OUR PRIDE. (Pathwork lecture 73)
not happen until we “care front” that part of ourselves that we judge
as our “Dark Side / Lower Self.” Care fronting is the word I use
for allowing these parts of our denied self to become conscious.
Until we learn to embrace and then to lovingly accept the part of
ourselves that we have rejected change will not occur. We “WILL”
keep on meeting others with the same beliefs and “broken parts”.
These people mirror back to us and assure us of fear’s greatest
teachings: we are damaged, we will never manifest our dreams, and we
are alone and separate.
What is very clear to me is that I have never really understood “FORGIVENESS”, or actually the
importance of the word ACCEPTANCE.
The first healing step for me, (beyond years of commitment to the
teachings of spirit) was to realize and accept that I was no longer
willing to believe in my shadow self. I had forgotten an
essential truth: I WAS NOT MY
This forgotten and rejected self is fear’s creation to keep me out of
the oneness and in the illusion. That I was separate from
G-d was truly the greatest illusion that fear had taught me.
My next step was to intentionally undo the insistence and the insanity
of my ego. How could I be all that my ego was whispering, and still
make supportive and loving choices? Emmanuel said:
ARE NOT THE VICTIM OF YOUR FEAR YOU ARE THE CREATOR OF IT.”
ATTENTION: THIS MARKS THE EXIT SIGN WHERE WE GET OFF.
What was true? Somewhere I read that:
WHO FORGIVE THEMSELVES ARE THOSE WHO ARE WILLING TO RELEASE
THEMSELVES FROM ILLUSION.”
I began to really understand from
a core knowing that this human incarnation was about healing this
split….there was no separation, I am the “I AM”.
G-d has never left me. I had left G-d. I realized that all
my years of study had left me with a profoundly articulate
“understanding” of incarnation and my spiritual journey. I
had the conceptual knowledge and not the wisdom. The wisdom,
which is the integrated “experience” kept eluding me.
MUST BE MARRIED TO ACTION….IF NOT, NOTHING CHANGES.
7. Marianne Williamson wrote: “The sun eclipsed is
not a sun forever hidden.” I no longer want to eclipse my
sun…my heart…and my light. I do not want to hide my love or
My desire to share my “light” has informed my intention for this love
letter: It is a love letter to Pat.
want to share with all who have known us, my gratitude to you,
Pat. It is two years since you went “Home.”
feel your spiritual presence with me more and more, as I feel the loss
of our physical connection. There is a deep bond, a tie that is
present. I can see and appreciate now that this relationship was
our souls’ assignment...to see beyond our physical bodies, and to
invite our angels in. What a gift…what fun…what joy and what a
delicious relationship we shared as we travelled the universe as the
chalices of spirit’s teachings.
was looking at some pictures of us…and found this letter that you wrote
to me, and reading it, I remembered the perfection of our relationship.
WHERE ANGELS BECKON”….
anyone had asked me when I was a little kid, to design a perfect friend,
would have given an absolute description of you. I
would have said:
she has to think I am funny, and I have to think she is funny.
Then we have to share the same passion for Truth, love, beauty and
she has to have a sense of adventure and a robust willingness to
then she has to be the one person I can say anything to knowing
I’ll never be judged and who trusts me in the same way. She
has to be someone I can be scared with and brave with…
and still have a good time.
you Barbara, the
Angels must have always known… Because
here you are.
I love you.”
have been sitting with this description of our relationship. What a
simple reminder of what an intimate relationship needs to offer each
partner. Pat, thank you for reminding me, and giving me an opportunity
to share with you the reality of a loving relationship for over thirty
I miss so much today is the loving mirror that you held up for me so
that I could remember who I am.
miss you, and I know that our love is eternal.
is the end of a lifetime, not the end of a relationship." -- Mitch Albom
Birthday Pat, dear friend of my heart.
you sit with me in silence, breathing in the love that surrounds us
when we choose to let go of fear’s hand.
offer you this prayer.
US TO SEE THE LIGHT IN EVERYONE.
US TO OPEN OUR HEARTS TO OUR HUMANNESS
US TO SEE BEYOND OUR PHYSICAL BEINGS INTO OUR ETERNAL CONSCIOUSNESS.
US TO REMEMBER WHO WE ARE.
PLEASE DEAR G-D LET EACH OF US, (IN THIS LIFETIME)
THE JOY AND DELIGHT OF LOVING.
GRATITUDE AND AWE
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