I am taking a big breath, filling every cell in my body... and sitting in the silence, this is what I hear:
I am already who (and so are you) the ME that I am trying so hard to be.  I am G-d's creation... and in His creation I am a vessel for His love.

I was told many years ago: "G-d does not make junk."
NO excuses, no blame, no shame, no finding fault, no mistakes...it is time just for the allowing and the accepting of this exquisiteness which comes from recognizing and owning:

 
I keep repeating the same message: "I am G-d's creation."  This my Mantra.

There is the reality that there will be some who receive this message, and then there will be those who insist on believing the messages of the Lower self, of the ego, of fear.

 
There are those who insist "life is hard."  There are those who believe the messages of their "back story."
There are those who have no faith (because for them faith needs to be proven) and insist that G-d do their will and prove His presence by answering their demands.
There are those who will not take responsibility for being their own "Merciful Mother."

For me, I am being bathed in G-d's love.  I have experienced the most incredible lesson and that is: 

 
It is only through diving deeply into losing what I've been so attached to that I can come into the lightness and joy of life.

 
 
What I know is that there is a simple curriculum for living this adventure called  LIFE.

 
The tenets are FALL IN  LOVE WITH YOURSELF and remember that you are the source of G-d's light.
There is not an author of a best selling self-help book that does not teach this.

 
I remember way back when one of my teachers said: All GURUs share one experience... they became a GURU because they owned  their authenticity:  G (ee) U (you) R (are) U (you).

To live a life of joy (Happiness is an Inside Job ~ Sylvia Boorstein) you must accept/receive all of yourself.
Acceptance is the beginning of forgiveness.
Think of the teachers that you have followed... think of their "teachings"... Wayne Dyer, Ram Das, Rajneesh, Eva Pierokos, Pat Rodegast, Stephen Levene and Jerry Jampolski, to name a few.

There is a difference between pain and suffering.
To suffer is to deny who you are. To suffer is to refuse and to deny your light. Suffering is walking into a dark room banging into the furniture, and refusing to put on the light...

REFUSING TO ACKNOWLEDGE THE LIGHT IS THERE

Denying who you are is the greatest pain... and this is what the Buddhists refer to as Samsara.
In the refusal to be your own Merciful Mother, in your demand and  in your belief that you can get love without being Loving is the scenario
that breaks your own heart.

 
 
We must begin with self-compassion. We begin doing this process by stopping in the moment, breathing and being a witness to what we are feeling without judgment.
This takes practice and mindfulness and bringing full attention to the moment asking:

 

...and then to acknowledge where you are feeling this in your body. There is no need in this moment to do anything else EXCEPT BREATHE into this part of your body, perhaps placing your hand there and accepting your feelings.

 
The next step is to ACCEPT that these painful feelings are a part of life....part of being human.  (remember we are angels having a human experience).

 
The next step is to be conscious of : "I have a choice in this moment... I will offer myself compassion and accept myself as I am in this moment."

 
I stop and attune my breath and G-d's breath and we enter into the at-one-ment.  "I am safe.  I am not alone... and I ask 'be with me' as I go through my numbness, (my defended self that fear has created) and the part of me that I have refused to feel."

 
Find one person, experience, and vocalize your gratitude.
The secret to having it all, is recognizing that you already do.

Please join me in this prayer.

Dear G-d,
Help me to remember that life is often painful,
Help me to have compassion for myself in these times.
Help me to hold my aching heart with mercy.
Help me to be gentle and to be my own compassionate Mother,
Help me to acknowledge what I need in this moment.
Help me, dear G-d, to ask gently for what I need without the demand
or expectation that it be given to me.
Help me to choose love, dear G-d.

To live with a closed heart filled with fear is the greatest pain there is.
Help me to remember that Love is an action, a conscious choice and that

 
with gratitude,
Barbara