What do I want to communicate?
I take a deep breath, and as I release the breath I feel it dancing through me and I feel this wondrous calm.
My home is filled with light. I realize so am I.
As a former school teacher this time of year is always the beginning, a new start.
I gratefully let go of last year with great gratitude for G-d's gentle reminder helping me turn my grieving into joy.
I am here... I matter and I have saved myself by going deeply into and accepting all of my feelings.
I found this poem by Jyoti Wind in my notes. (I've added and changing some of her words.)
"I am not looking to be saved.
What would I need to be saved from?
My own sleep walking, my own unconsciousness?
I pray to G-d to show me where I am in my negative intent
and to help me to see my resistance.
I work on letting go of my fear and my judgments.
My commitment is to firmly redirect my mind,
my intention, and to embrace it all.
I am not looking to be saved...
I am working on remembering who I am."
This led me to ask myself the following questions. I offer you these.
Are you willing to answer the following questions and send me your written answers?
Are you willing to commit yourself to this deep self-reflection and have a conversation with me?
Your answers are indeed the basis of my Master's Class In Love.
Yesterday was the end of the Jewish holiday celebrating the Jewish New Year... the time when we are asked to go inside and reflect on how we lived this past year... to ponder our transgressions.
Indeed to ask ourselves:
Are you willing to own and accept that when we do harm to another we are also transgressing against G-d/the Divine/Spirit?
Do you accept that when you are lost in your victimhood, your back story... when you are unwilling to accept that you are made in G-d's image you are truly rejecting the love, joy and glory that could be available to you?
What part of you is willing to call for G-d's help?
The wonderful story of Jonah in the belly of the Whale answers some of these questions.
How about taking the time, the space to sit in the belly of your whale?
What and who are you running away from?
How do you not take responsibility and blame it all on G-d? (even the hurricanes, the earthquakes... where could man, having taken responsibility and prevented some of the loss?)
These disasters are not to be blamed on G-d as punishment etc. G-d does not punish. (But that's another conversation)
The big question is: When are you responsible and G-d is not!!!? When do you not take responsibility and demand that G-d fix it? (This makes me smile)
This year, I found out that I must walk humbly and take responsibility for the one aspect of my life that I am responsible for -- and that is, to truly love myself so that I can act from that consciousness...
I am capable of unlimited love... and that is the guiding principle of my life.
"To the degree you offer generously and trustingly the best you have to give to life, allowing G-d to take over, to that very same degree will you feel perfectly entitled to spread your arms wide to receive the best life has to offer."
-- Pathwork Lecture 212
Please join me in inviting yourself into your own heart.
I offer you this with all the love in the universe.
Find a comfortable place to sit.
Light a candle... and set your intent to hear the voice of your heart.
"Be still and know that I am G-d.
Be still and know that "I AM".
Be still and know....
In grace and with many blessings,Barbara
Please listen to Leonard Cohen - Who By Fire