April 2018

Dear One,
It is almost Spring... but here in Northern California we are still having storms.

This line is from one of my favorite poems:
    "If Winter comes, can Spring be far behind?"
     ~ Percy B. Shelley

It helps me to remember.

I, and many of you dear hearts, have gone through an emotional winter. We have gone through physical crises, emotional and heart breaking challenges, the death of our dreams, and for some, the death of a loved one.

I have learned a great lesson, by going through my pain.... moving through the darkness, I have been given a gift.
Death... is our greatest teacher... and welcomes us into life.

I would like to share this note that was pinned on my Oncologist's wall:

Cancer (and all life threatening challenges ~ B.A.) might rob you of that blissful ignorance that once led you to believe that tomorrow stretched forever and in exchange, you are granted the vision to see each day as a precious gift to be wisely and richly....

I do not finish that sentence on purpose.  Those of us who have gone through these experiences now know something very important. 
Please take time and sit, aligning yourself with the gift of your new awareness of life that you were given as you walked through your pain.
"Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil..."
    Psalm 23

Please take time to go through these experiences, and then, finish the sentence with your  new awareness.

My response to life will never be the same.

Marianne Williamson wrote:
"Crucifixion is the energy pattern of fear, the manifestation of a closed heart.  Resurrection is the reversal of that pattern, brought about by a shift in thought from fear to love."

My gift  has to become unabashedly grateful, and to know that Gd is in everything I experience.

Although my heart still has frozen areas... I know most of  my heart has thawed, and now gratitude and faith beat through  my body.  They are the pulse of my life.

I can not look for happiness outside of myself.  Joy comes from within... from knowing and accepting who I am.  I have come to celebrate the Gd within... and then and only then can I see the light  in you.  Together we dance the dance of love, and sing the song of joy.

~ D. Walcott
"The time will come when with elation you will greet yourself arriving at your own door,
in your own mirror and each will smile at the other's welcome, and say:
SIT here... EAT.
You will love again the stranger who was yourself.
Give wine. Give bread. Give back your heart to itself, to the stranger who has loved you all your life,
and whom you have ignored, who knows you by heart.
Take down the love letters from the bookshelf, the photographs, the desparate notes,
peel your own image from the mirror...

Fall in love with yourself.  Now is the time to walk through the veil of illusion.  Suffering is not our reality... it is a symptom of self denial, a belief that you are not Gd enough.

Emmanuel would say:
    "If you are living in the past, you are not present.
     If you are living in the future, you are not present.
     If you are not present, who is?"

I say:
    "Wake up!
     Yesterday is gone.
     Today is almost over...
     Tomorrow is not promised..."

Are you willing to see each day as a precious gift?
Are you willing to accept who you are: A vessel for Gd's love?
Are you willing to abide in the House of the Lord forever?
It is time.

Barbara  (AKA Glabman-Cohen-Azzara)